Well, it's almost here (and by the time anyone reads this, it WILL be here): 2011
While 2010 was not one of the best years of my life (I mean, seriously, 2-1/2 months of strep throat!), I'm still not jumping for joy that we've hit 2011. This is THE YEAR.
The year Aidan graduates high school.
The year Aidan leaves home and enters college.
It is my earnest prayer that these are the "worst" things that happen in our lives this coming year. But that doesn't mean I'm looking forward to them. I know God has amazing things in store for my amazing son, and I am honestly looking forward to seeing how all God's plans play out in his life. I just hate that it's here already. That the adorable baby who used to study my mouth so hard to try to figure out how to get language out of his mouth is now going to leave the nest to study how languages work. (Okay, I have to stop this right now because I'm about to ring in the new year with tears in my eyes, and I don't want to do that.)
I started reading a new book the other day called "Spiritual Rhythm" by Mark Buchanan, and in the dedication he says something like "To my son ... The seasons from holding you to letting you go went by too fast."
Amen, Mark. Amen.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Friday, December 17, 2010
Another Acceptance
Well, Aidan got an e-mail (!) from the University of Chicago today, and he has been accepted there, as well.
Notice I'm not jumping up and down and screaming happily about this one.
So, although the situation is different, we still have the same dilemma -- UT or UC?
I know what I'm pulling for.
Aidan, I think, really wants to go to the University of Chicago. I think he has it in his head it would be different from here and therefore "exotic." It does sound like they have an outstanding linguistics program, but then so does UT. Plus UT would be cheaper for us. And we'd get to see him more than once or twice a year.
What is with kids wanting to get away from home?? It's not like his home life has been horribly restrictive and unbearable. He'll get away from us soon enough, once he hits grad school. And he's dying to live in Japan, so I am in no hurry for him to gallivant off to Illinois, or anywhere else outside a 300-mile radius.
Yeah, ho ho ho, Merry Christmas.
Notice I'm not jumping up and down and screaming happily about this one.
So, although the situation is different, we still have the same dilemma -- UT or UC?
I know what I'm pulling for.
Aidan, I think, really wants to go to the University of Chicago. I think he has it in his head it would be different from here and therefore "exotic." It does sound like they have an outstanding linguistics program, but then so does UT. Plus UT would be cheaper for us. And we'd get to see him more than once or twice a year.
What is with kids wanting to get away from home?? It's not like his home life has been horribly restrictive and unbearable. He'll get away from us soon enough, once he hits grad school. And he's dying to live in Japan, so I am in no hurry for him to gallivant off to Illinois, or anywhere else outside a 300-mile radius.
Yeah, ho ho ho, Merry Christmas.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
ACCEPTED!!
Aidan has been accepted at the University of Texas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He hasn't let them know he's coming yet. I think he still wants to see if U Chicago will accept him, and he's still thinking about applying to Rice (for whatever reason). Honestly, though, I don't think we can afford the other two. It will depend on scholarships, etc., but hopefully we can convince him UT is the place for now.
As long as that's God's will.
He's pretty chuffed, though. So glad all that hard work paid off!
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Minnow Paws
WARNING: This is a brain dump caused by menopause. I'm not responsible for its content. You'll have to blame my hormones for that.
This has been a rough week (and it's only Tuesday!). I'm going through about 32 different things all at once, and I might jut go crazy. Of course there's the Aidan Leaving Home thing. At this point it looks like there is nowhere in the-place-they-don't-serve-breakfast that I can do that, that I can survive this awesome, amazing and wonderful kid NOT being a daily part of my life after 18 years.
My husband is stressed all the freaking time, and it's not fun. I love him, no worries there, but I might end up in a state hospital from this.
My health won't let me go out and do enough things to keep busy, so I have to manufacture stuff to do at home. I'm not into stamping or scrapping right now. Ditto genealogy. I am VERY into writing, so that's a good thing, but I am incredibly depressed that I can't get anyone to read my fictional blog, which is my Big Story. The novel I've been working on for the last four years (off and on), basically. And it ain't because I don't write well. I think there's some awesome stuff in there. I think it's mostly awesome stuff. But I can't even get my own husband to read it, and my mother can't because of glasses issues. (Nobody reads this blog, either, so I don't know why any of this surprises me.)
I think I have one "fan," who just happens to be writing her own fictional blog, so we kinda have to keep each other buoyed up. Except that she's got a lot of friends who read hers. I'm having a huge pity party about this tonight. And I'm writing it here because I'm frustrated and I just need somewhere to write it.
And Phil Joel is no longer one of the Newsboys. (Yeah, I know that was nearly four years ago that he quit, but some days it still really depresses me. His solo stuff is awesome, but I just think he and Peter should still be Newsboys. Technically Peter still is, but he's not on stage anymore. I say get rid of Michael Tait and put Pete and Phil back in, and it'll all be good.) I know, I'm 47 years old and I act like I'm 17 most of the time. It be what it be.
My spiritual life is lagging, and I worry that I've got mental issues. (See above paragraph.)
I cry at the drop of a hat. Buckets.
I don't want to do hormone therapy. Even bioidenticals can have health issues.
In spite of all this, I can still say God is good all the time.
Thank you, and good night.
This has been a rough week (and it's only Tuesday!). I'm going through about 32 different things all at once, and I might jut go crazy. Of course there's the Aidan Leaving Home thing. At this point it looks like there is nowhere in the-place-they-don't-serve-breakfast that I can do that, that I can survive this awesome, amazing and wonderful kid NOT being a daily part of my life after 18 years.
My husband is stressed all the freaking time, and it's not fun. I love him, no worries there, but I might end up in a state hospital from this.
My health won't let me go out and do enough things to keep busy, so I have to manufacture stuff to do at home. I'm not into stamping or scrapping right now. Ditto genealogy. I am VERY into writing, so that's a good thing, but I am incredibly depressed that I can't get anyone to read my fictional blog, which is my Big Story. The novel I've been working on for the last four years (off and on), basically. And it ain't because I don't write well. I think there's some awesome stuff in there. I think it's mostly awesome stuff. But I can't even get my own husband to read it, and my mother can't because of glasses issues. (Nobody reads this blog, either, so I don't know why any of this surprises me.)
I think I have one "fan," who just happens to be writing her own fictional blog, so we kinda have to keep each other buoyed up. Except that she's got a lot of friends who read hers. I'm having a huge pity party about this tonight. And I'm writing it here because I'm frustrated and I just need somewhere to write it.
And Phil Joel is no longer one of the Newsboys. (Yeah, I know that was nearly four years ago that he quit, but some days it still really depresses me. His solo stuff is awesome, but I just think he and Peter should still be Newsboys. Technically Peter still is, but he's not on stage anymore. I say get rid of Michael Tait and put Pete and Phil back in, and it'll all be good.) I know, I'm 47 years old and I act like I'm 17 most of the time. It be what it be.My spiritual life is lagging, and I worry that I've got mental issues. (See above paragraph.)
I cry at the drop of a hat. Buckets.
I don't want to do hormone therapy. Even bioidenticals can have health issues.
In spite of all this, I can still say God is good all the time.
Thank you, and good night.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
How Long, O Lord, How Long?
We've been busy with lots of things lately, so I haven't had a chance (or the inclination or whatever) to blog lately, at least here, so I apologize to all my readers who have been absolutely dying to hear from me.
--- sound of hysterical laughter ---
Okay, back to reality.
I have been blogging, just not here. I'm writing a fictional blog (aka "blogfiction") and that is heaps of fun and has taken up a lot of my time. I'd already written most of the story in 3rd person, so I've been converting it to 1st person and trying to make it fit the concept of a blog, although my entries, by necessity, have to be longer than an average blog post. Anyway, if you're interested, you can check it out here: Caddie Emerging (first post)
This is what we've been dealing with lately on the college app front (just substitute the words "college essays" for "English lit project":
He did manage to get in his app to UChicago by the early app deadline of Nov. 1. Now he needs to get his butt in gear on the UT Honors College app, the UT 40 Acres Scholarship app, and the Rice Univ. application. ALL the UT stuff has to be in by December 1, I believe.
I'm so tired of pushing this kid to get stuff done. He was really fired up about getting everything in early back at the first of September, but then we discovered just how freaking many essays one has to write to apply to universities, and it all went downhill from there. I don't blame him. The whole system is stupid, but since I don't think it'll change between now and the time he has to get his apps in, we just have to live with it.
UT's football team has been REALLY stinking this year. We're not really into that, but I'm hoping maybe it'll mean fewer people will apply to UT if they thing the team is going to stink. Hey, I'm grasping at anything, here. UT is a very popular school and it's very hard to get in because of that. But you know that.
Anyway, we have a "Senior Parent/Student Brown Bag Lunch" coming up in another couple of weeks -- to measure for caps and gowns and to look at graduation announcement stationers. No way am I ready for this!
Ugh. Okay, I'm going off to do something else right now before I end up a teary mess sogging up the sofa ...
--- sound of hysterical laughter ---
Okay, back to reality.
I have been blogging, just not here. I'm writing a fictional blog (aka "blogfiction") and that is heaps of fun and has taken up a lot of my time. I'd already written most of the story in 3rd person, so I've been converting it to 1st person and trying to make it fit the concept of a blog, although my entries, by necessity, have to be longer than an average blog post. Anyway, if you're interested, you can check it out here: Caddie Emerging (first post)
This is what we've been dealing with lately on the college app front (just substitute the words "college essays" for "English lit project":
He did manage to get in his app to UChicago by the early app deadline of Nov. 1. Now he needs to get his butt in gear on the UT Honors College app, the UT 40 Acres Scholarship app, and the Rice Univ. application. ALL the UT stuff has to be in by December 1, I believe.
I'm so tired of pushing this kid to get stuff done. He was really fired up about getting everything in early back at the first of September, but then we discovered just how freaking many essays one has to write to apply to universities, and it all went downhill from there. I don't blame him. The whole system is stupid, but since I don't think it'll change between now and the time he has to get his apps in, we just have to live with it.
UT's football team has been REALLY stinking this year. We're not really into that, but I'm hoping maybe it'll mean fewer people will apply to UT if they thing the team is going to stink. Hey, I'm grasping at anything, here. UT is a very popular school and it's very hard to get in because of that. But you know that.
Anyway, we have a "Senior Parent/Student Brown Bag Lunch" coming up in another couple of weeks -- to measure for caps and gowns and to look at graduation announcement stationers. No way am I ready for this!
Ugh. Okay, I'm going off to do something else right now before I end up a teary mess sogging up the sofa ...
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Inequity
This may turn into a rant, so please forgive me.
No, Aidan has not even turned in an application to any college yet (although the goal is to get the one for UT in today). No, he has not been rejected by any college yet.
But after talking with his college counselor a couple of times and finding out just how ridiculously hard it is for WHITE MIDDLE-CLASS KIDS WHOSE PARENTS ARE WELL-EDUCATED to get accepted at some of these universities, I am hopping mad.
Diversity. I hate that word like you wouldn't believe. It's not that I don't believe we should be "equal opportunity" in who gets accepted at colleges -- I'm all for that -- but the "equal opportunity" should be based on MERIT ALONE, not on your race, ethnicity, socio-economic status, or whether or not you'll be the first in your family to go to college.
Everyone should have a chance to get into the university of their choice.
Schools whose senior classes have fewer than 100 kids in them should have a different criteria for automatic entry to UT than "top 8%." In Aidan's school, that is ONE KID. Aidan is SECOND in his class, and just a few hundredths of a grade point behind the top kid. Aidan has better test scores than the top kid. She definitely deserves her valedictorian status, but I don't even think she's applying to UT, and Aidan is. Why shouldn't he have the same shot she does? Just because his school is small and "top 8%" means ONE PERSON, he doesn't get automatic entry into UT even though he is every bit as academically talented as she is. This is wrong.
Bjorn actually suggested at the end of last year that we pull Aidan out of his Christian school and send him to the local public school for his senior year so he could be in the top 8%. In the end we decided this was not what God wanted us to do, so we didn't. I feel pretty sure God will honor our decision to obey him ;-), but I am very peeved that we have to stress over it.
Okay, we don't have to stress over it. God will put Aidan where He wants Aidan (as long as we're being attentive to His will). Still, there is an awful lot of hard work involved in simply applying, and that IS on Aidan's shoulders. God's not going to give Aidan's applications favor with any admissions officials if he turns in a crappy app.
I hate all this stress. I think it's totally unnecessary. I think a whole freakin' lot of it is due to our emphasis on "diversity" that ends up shoving the white middle-class kids off to the side. Yes, in the past these kids have had better chances than their non-white and/or poor counterparts. But MY child (or any other WM-C kid) should not be penalized for something they have no control over (the past). How is that any less "racist" or "unfair" than what caused this diversity-loving thing in the first place?
Again, let me state unequivocally that I am NOT against poor, and/or non-white, and/or otherwise non-academically challenged kids having an equal shot at the openings in this nation's universities. But I AM against shoving the WM-C kids aside in order to meet quotas and be "fair." If these universities are really trying to make themselves the best universities in America/the world, then why in heck would they want to shove aside some of the brightest kids they could get their hands on? (One of Rice University's essay questions is that you write how you can add to the amazing diversity they already have at Rice. How about ... hey, I might be the only white middle-class male in your freshman class! Now that's diversity!)
Okay, I'm done now. I know Aidan's future is in God's hands. I'm just freaking annoyed that, after all the hard work he has put into the last 12 years of his life, he has to work even harder just to make that hard work pay off.
No, Aidan has not even turned in an application to any college yet (although the goal is to get the one for UT in today). No, he has not been rejected by any college yet.
But after talking with his college counselor a couple of times and finding out just how ridiculously hard it is for WHITE MIDDLE-CLASS KIDS WHOSE PARENTS ARE WELL-EDUCATED to get accepted at some of these universities, I am hopping mad.
Diversity. I hate that word like you wouldn't believe. It's not that I don't believe we should be "equal opportunity" in who gets accepted at colleges -- I'm all for that -- but the "equal opportunity" should be based on MERIT ALONE, not on your race, ethnicity, socio-economic status, or whether or not you'll be the first in your family to go to college.
Everyone should have a chance to get into the university of their choice.
Schools whose senior classes have fewer than 100 kids in them should have a different criteria for automatic entry to UT than "top 8%." In Aidan's school, that is ONE KID. Aidan is SECOND in his class, and just a few hundredths of a grade point behind the top kid. Aidan has better test scores than the top kid. She definitely deserves her valedictorian status, but I don't even think she's applying to UT, and Aidan is. Why shouldn't he have the same shot she does? Just because his school is small and "top 8%" means ONE PERSON, he doesn't get automatic entry into UT even though he is every bit as academically talented as she is. This is wrong.
Bjorn actually suggested at the end of last year that we pull Aidan out of his Christian school and send him to the local public school for his senior year so he could be in the top 8%. In the end we decided this was not what God wanted us to do, so we didn't. I feel pretty sure God will honor our decision to obey him ;-), but I am very peeved that we have to stress over it.
Okay, we don't have to stress over it. God will put Aidan where He wants Aidan (as long as we're being attentive to His will). Still, there is an awful lot of hard work involved in simply applying, and that IS on Aidan's shoulders. God's not going to give Aidan's applications favor with any admissions officials if he turns in a crappy app.
I hate all this stress. I think it's totally unnecessary. I think a whole freakin' lot of it is due to our emphasis on "diversity" that ends up shoving the white middle-class kids off to the side. Yes, in the past these kids have had better chances than their non-white and/or poor counterparts. But MY child (or any other WM-C kid) should not be penalized for something they have no control over (the past). How is that any less "racist" or "unfair" than what caused this diversity-loving thing in the first place?
Again, let me state unequivocally that I am NOT against poor, and/or non-white, and/or otherwise non-academically challenged kids having an equal shot at the openings in this nation's universities. But I AM against shoving the WM-C kids aside in order to meet quotas and be "fair." If these universities are really trying to make themselves the best universities in America/the world, then why in heck would they want to shove aside some of the brightest kids they could get their hands on? (One of Rice University's essay questions is that you write how you can add to the amazing diversity they already have at Rice. How about ... hey, I might be the only white middle-class male in your freshman class! Now that's diversity!)
Okay, I'm done now. I know Aidan's future is in God's hands. I'm just freaking annoyed that, after all the hard work he has put into the last 12 years of his life, he has to work even harder just to make that hard work pay off.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
I love Zits - but not campus shooters
(The comic, not the icky face things)
This is today's Zits cartoon, and I totally LOVE it! It is sooooooo true of what we're going through right now ...
BTW -- any of you who use Blogger ... when using the new interface/editor I had no image upload button, I had to go back to the old editor. Anyone else have that problem?
Yesterday an idiot with an AK-47 opened fire on the University of Texas campus. Praise God he didn't hit anyone, but he did end up killing himself after being chased up six flights of stairs into the Perry-Casteneda Library.
All I could think when I heard about this was: 1) Thank God my "baby" wasn't doing a campus visit yesterday!, and 2) We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.
I knew we weren't "in Kansas" anymore after the Columbine Massacre. But my kid goes to a small Christian school, and although a shooting is possible anywhere, the chances are rather slim. I've been lulled into a false sense of security. College awaits, and alongside the other "parental fears" of kids losing their faith, kids falling in with the wrong crowd, etc., we have the fear of our kid being shot by some maniac with a gun.
I don't see how people who aren't Christians cope with that fear. As it is, I have to bring myself back around to the knowledge that, whatever happens, Aidan's life is in God's hands, and that's exactly where I want it to be. I personally think yesterday was a miracle -- guy with an AK-47 shows up on campus at 8 in the morning and starts firing shots while people are coming to their classes. Nobody is even hurt. From what one eyewitness said, he fired into the ground -- so either he never was really planning to kill anyone (in which case you have to wonder why he went to all the trouble of doing the AK-47/ski mask bit), or he changed his mind at the last minute. Some might even say it's possible there was angelic assistance in keeping that gun aimed at the ground. Any way I look at it I see divine intervention. Of course, God doesn't always choose to stop these things, and I don't pretend to know why. I trust that He knows what He's doing and has an ultimate purpose for whatever happens. I certainly hope and pray that Aidan is never caught up in anything like that!
So ... calmer today (I was a little freaked for awhile yesterday), and on with the college process. Aidan is finally working on his second essay for UT, with the goal of getting his app in by Thursday, Friday at the latest. Please pray that he'll write a super stellar one and that whoever ends up reading his essays will be majorly impressed!
Off to get the clothes out of the dryer ...
This is today's Zits cartoon, and I totally LOVE it! It is sooooooo true of what we're going through right now ...
BTW -- any of you who use Blogger ... when using the new interface/editor I had no image upload button, I had to go back to the old editor. Anyone else have that problem?
Yesterday an idiot with an AK-47 opened fire on the University of Texas campus. Praise God he didn't hit anyone, but he did end up killing himself after being chased up six flights of stairs into the Perry-Casteneda Library.
All I could think when I heard about this was: 1) Thank God my "baby" wasn't doing a campus visit yesterday!, and 2) We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.
I knew we weren't "in Kansas" anymore after the Columbine Massacre. But my kid goes to a small Christian school, and although a shooting is possible anywhere, the chances are rather slim. I've been lulled into a false sense of security. College awaits, and alongside the other "parental fears" of kids losing their faith, kids falling in with the wrong crowd, etc., we have the fear of our kid being shot by some maniac with a gun.
I don't see how people who aren't Christians cope with that fear. As it is, I have to bring myself back around to the knowledge that, whatever happens, Aidan's life is in God's hands, and that's exactly where I want it to be. I personally think yesterday was a miracle -- guy with an AK-47 shows up on campus at 8 in the morning and starts firing shots while people are coming to their classes. Nobody is even hurt. From what one eyewitness said, he fired into the ground -- so either he never was really planning to kill anyone (in which case you have to wonder why he went to all the trouble of doing the AK-47/ski mask bit), or he changed his mind at the last minute. Some might even say it's possible there was angelic assistance in keeping that gun aimed at the ground. Any way I look at it I see divine intervention. Of course, God doesn't always choose to stop these things, and I don't pretend to know why. I trust that He knows what He's doing and has an ultimate purpose for whatever happens. I certainly hope and pray that Aidan is never caught up in anything like that!
So ... calmer today (I was a little freaked for awhile yesterday), and on with the college process. Aidan is finally working on his second essay for UT, with the goal of getting his app in by Thursday, Friday at the latest. Please pray that he'll write a super stellar one and that whoever ends up reading his essays will be majorly impressed!
Off to get the clothes out of the dryer ...
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